How can you love someone so much and you have never even met them!

How can you love someone so much and you have never even met them!

Well that’s the case for Kyanne Berline Cormier. Monday when we received the proposal it all seemed like a dream. I’ve been waiting for this moment for 2 years, 7 months. I had scenarios recited on how this day was going to happen. Every morning I would wake up, made sure I was ready for the big day, listen to our home voice mails 5 times a day in case they would call our house, had my cell with me at all times, emailed JR each time we went on vacation to make sure they were aware and they would try to reach us on our cell to give us the news. The one day that I had finally said it out loud that whatever the universe had planned for my future, I would accept. I was at lunch with my cousin and I told her in the exact words that if for some reason this adoption would not go through, something else would go wrong, I would just accept it and not try to change my destiny. I would just get 2 more dogs and enjoy life and stop trying to plan my life. I would just live my life in the PRESENT! For those of you who know me.... this is not a skill I have. I always have to plan; do roll play in my head to make sure everything is going to work out as planned. Well to my surprise, 30 minutes after I said that I was ready to just live and let things happen on its own... I get the call for our little princess. It was so weird because that day I had told everybody that yes Dixie said on her blog that we were match with our child, however... we didn’t know how many days...weeks...months it would take the province to give our proposal. And what do you know, I was sitting at my desk, phone rang, I was going to let it go to voice mail because Melanie was at my desk showing me something with my travel claim and something made me pick up the receiver and there it was... the phone call I was waiting for and I was not even prepared for it LOL! So lesson learned!!! Enjoy every moment of your life and live in the present and be able to accept your future as it comes.

So to get back to my ‘How can you love someone so much and you have never even met them!’ I can tell you that I was not ready that day to say, I’m Berline’s mommy. It was all too much and I was too excited to play out some scenarios. We just left to get our proposal. That was it... As soon as we saw her beautiful smile and healthy rolls on her arms LOL, we knew she was ours. That evening, it I was just processing the idea that she was my daughter but it was just all in my thoughts. The next day when we signed the acceptance letter and Elaine told me it was already sent to Dixie, I then felt a warm fuzzy feeling that this was the moment that I am now a mother and I have responsibility for this little girl. We have picture of her everywhere in the house and we just sit and stare at her pictures. I can feel her in my heart. Now till it’s time to bring her home, I’m going to live in the moment... try to study (was not able to do any of that this week). I have lots of things to keep me busy so I have confidence that Kyanne Berline Cormier will be home with us sooner that we expect it! This is going to change our lifestyle for a much better one! We are both committed to this and are ready to give her love and guide her as she grows up to be the person she chooses to be. She will have many doors of opportunity waiting for her.