Sunday, May 22, 2011

Matches Made in Heaven

This is why I need to keep focused on and stay on track :) xoxoxxoox

Posted by Holli at GLA
Several times a day I think to myself “I can’t believe I get to do this!”. Some days I think to myself, “I can’t believe I’m seeing this”. Overall my feelings are that I cannot believe I get to experience this life.

I’ve mentioned that one of the things I feel privileged to witness is to see a family meet their child for the first time. Joy, joy, joy is this overwhelming emotion radiating from the parents. It’s contagious. You catch it and imagine the world stretched out before them! Happy beginnings, and I get to be there! How lucky am I?

The remarkable thing is how God orchestrated their lives to intersect. Its one of the hardest things to witness a mother give up her child. It wrenches the heart. But how great is the moment they are united with a family God has selected for them. That moment is sweet. And it never fails to amaze me how naturally the child fits into the family, like a lost puzzle piece.

This week Berline’s family is at GLA for the next step in their adoption. Berline is one of our babies that is constantly cheerful and always smiling. And so are her parents! It’s been a delight to watch them together. It’s obvious to anyone watching that they are a family already, that God intended her for them from before she was born. Its these moments that make all the hard work and emotions worth the while.

Saturday, May 21, 2011

How I feel right now!

I’ve been back from home now for 4 days and just got out of the house today. I know it’s a combination of everything but we did catch a bug in Miami right before we left. Seems everyone home has the same thing so I am happy that it’s not a parasite or something we got in Haiti. I still don’t have any appetite at all today. If I seen food, I just want to vomit. I just need to get something out of my check because I am getting too emotional that I can no longer function.

Yes Haiti is corrupt and there are bad people doing bad things to teach other over there but did you take them time and look around were you are right now... there might not be buildings crushed down and people living in tents in your neighbourhood but dear god they are human as well and they need to survive. Down home the homeless have places to shower, eat and drink water. They chose to be on the street. If they have some kind of mental illness, they have programs for them. In Haiti they have none of that. After more than a year of the earthquake, the same tent cities are still there and some of them still have to beg for clean water and children are still born under these circumstances.

So sorry if I don’t have any pity for you right now for your problems or your comments... it’s not that I don’t care it’s just that you can probably think for awhile and find a solution or find someone to help you with your problem.

Yes I just got back from a 3rd World Country and my husband and I got home sick as a dog but no It was not because of Haiti and even if it was... I would do it all over again if the little I did over there counted in some ways and helped someone. If we wouldn’t be doing what we are doing right now, Berline (Kyanne) would be living on the side of the street in Kenscoff with her mother that is unemployed and her 2 other siblings. Berline’s birth mom has not given up her daughter by bringing her to GLA at 14 days. She has given her a chance to live and be cared for. When Berline (Kyanne) grown up, we will explain and teach her about her birth place and will bring her to her roots. I’m sure she will as well want to help in every way she can.

I know it’s really overwhelming when you get in PAP. You feel that your suites cases full of supplies and few $ 100 bills are worthless overlooking at the disaster but if everyone does a little bit, each bit counts and it makes you feel good inside.

So for the people reading my blog, I was not directing this at any of you. I just had to vent!

Thank you for your support! xoxo

Monday, May 16, 2011

Last day with Berline (Kyanne)

May 13, 2010

I woke up with butterflies in my tummy. I knew it was our last day with Berline. We had breakfast and left for the toddler house. We had brought supplies and treats for the toddlers. It was emotional seeing all those little faces run to us to get their treats. They all sat in a circle waiting for Victor to pass them a treat. They sang songs and were following us around.

We walked down to the main house. As we were walking upstairs to go in the nursery, Dixie stopped us and asked us about our experience yesterday at the court. She thought it was funny. For some reason I didn’t think it was that funny but I guess we’re in Haiti and nobody is stressed and they do what needs to be done when they feel like it.

When Berline saw us enter the room, her little eyes glazed at us with a big smile on her face. We had to go downstairs for a few hours because Dixie was having a staff meeting on the balcony. We played for a bit and then she fell asleep in Victor’s arms. After 30 minutes of watching them sleep, I joined them for a nap. It felt really comfortable!!! I had not realized that Holli took some pictures of us while we were sleeping...

When it was time for lunch, I didn’t want to put her back with the others so we took our turn to go downstairs to eat. All day, the volunteers had Théo, Nathan and Geraldson. It was fun to see them play together. As the time was ticking, I knew this wonderful journey was coming to an end. Berline was a little cranky in the pm because she had did not take a nap. We tried to get her to fall asleep but it was like she knew that it was our last day. When we brought her to the nursery when we went down for Dinner we knew she would fall asleep. 30 minutes after, I could not resist and had to go back. I knew it was our last goodbye. She was sound asleep with a hoody on top of her tinny head. The nanny had taken out her elastics because it was hurting her. I went to say my goodbye’s to Djeff. Poor little fellow was crying to. I think he knew that we were leaving. I got attached to him so much as well. I can’t wait for Liette to be able to go meet her little guy as well. He is truly a special little boy. I then went to see Nathan and Geraldson. I truly hope someday, we’ll be able to reunite all of them.

This is the moment I just didn’t want to go through. I went back to see Berline. I sat beside her bed to watch her sleep. Tears were running down my cheeks and the nanny asked if it was our last day and I said yes. She immediately reached in the crib and woke her up. I reached to take her in my arms and just didn’t want to let go. We stayed with her for another 30 minutes or so and had to leave her behind with the nannies. It was heart breaking. We went one last time to see Théo and take one last picture with the 2 of them. Théo and I were crying. Berline was staying strong for her mommy. If she would of cried, I don’t think I could of left. She loves the nannies so I but her in the arms of one of them and she was watching us walk away. I had to be strong and keep praying that our next trip will be taking her from the nannies arms and not letting go. She will be with her forever family soon! I believe and know it will be soon!

When we got downstairs, Brandon was there waiting for us. He knew I was hurting. He gave me a big hug to comfort me. He said they will pray for us to bring her home soon.

The group that were on a mission, staying with us at the guest house were really supportive of us. 2 of the men had already gone through international adoption. One of them from GLA and the other China i think. They are the producers of Like Dandelion Dust...!/LikeDandelionDustWe had another fun night of massages and pretend make over with Bailee and Kylee. Melissa, the Adoption Coordinator had come to the guest house to see Nikki and Brandon for the evening. Before she left, she came to say goodbye. She is a really sweet girl. I am really grateful for the wonderful staff at GLA. They are all nice. She said that now we just have to sit back and wait for our dossier to finish its process. She said she will email us at each time our dossier progresses to the next step.

Adoption approved by Dean in PAP

May 12, 2011

This morning I was up at 5am. I wanted to go down to the main house right away and see our baby girl. We waited till 7:30 and then I said let’s go! Victor was not confident that I was able to get us down there alone. He wanted to wait for the others but I said worry pas... follow me LOL! It was kind of funny because I had memorised the walk... Turn left, then right, then left and continue left. So when we got to the turn right... i asked him if we should go that way or the other right LOL! He looked at me with a empty cloud ... heheh! We did get there and went straight up to see Berline. She was still sleeping so I went to spend time with Djeff (Théo). We is such a sweaty. He loves to be held.

 Nikki preparing pancakes for breakfast at the guest house.

When Berline woke up, I asked the nannies if I was able to feed her. Well that did not go well at all. I don’t think one bite went in her mouth. Just on her clothes, face and mine LOL!

Before leaving for PAP, we decided to do a little photo shoot in White. We had fun!!!

Around 9 am, we left with Magalie and Theriault for Port-au-Prince to go to court. I thought Victor was going to have a heart attack. He was driving like a maniac. Our heads were spinning in the back. Half way down to PAP, we dropped off Magalie and she left us with the driver that we did not know at the time that he was actually the one who works on our adoption dossier with her.
When we finally arrived to court after 1 1\2 drive, we walked up to the entrance and we were refused. We were not dresses properly. I guess you cannot have shorts and tops with no sleeves. Nobody told us that. We left the orphanage and they all saw us... We sort of thought about it in our heads but because yesterday was so informal at Judge Bob, we did not really think that we were actually going to a government building. Theriault wanted to turn around and come back tomorrow. I said NO! We are going to stop and buy clothes. We were in Port – au – Prince, in the middle of the rumble and went inside a store, I bought a shirt and long black pants for $50 and Victor bought a pair of jeans on the side of the street. I looked like I had a Halloween costume on. The clothes did not fit that good.

We waited about 2 1\2 hours in line. Everyone was passing in front of us to see the Dean. It was crazy. Almost empty room and all of a sudden, about 20 people came with papers and they all go to see her before us. Finally we were next in line and next thing you know, someone got in front that slipped the guard some money in his pocket. When we finally sat down in her office, she asked us a few questions. She asked, why do you want to adopt, why did you chose Haiti, What do you do for a living, how will you be able to take care of her if you both are working. She then asked us for more pictures of Berline. Magalie had only put one picture in our dossier. Thank god I had my camera and had 300 pictures already LOL! She then smiled and told us we were approved. At that point, we were so relieved! Now our dossier goes into Parquet and Courts. We are praying hard that this wait will not be long. We need to bring our little princess home. When we got back in the truck, it was about 3pm. We had not gone to the bathroom, drank water or ate... We stopped on the side of the street for water and deep fried banana... yum yum!

After that painful day, our little sweet girl, Théo and Nathan were waiting for us to start the Birthday Party! They are all turning 1 year old. Théo’s birthday was actually the day before. His’s was very special. It was funny to see their reaction with the cake. Théo did not like it at all. I think he was scared by the whole thing. Berline on the other hand was intrigue.

When we got to the guest house, our evening was not over. We had to have a slumber party with Baillee and Kaylee. These girls have so much energy. Last year Koffee was too little. This year, he really opened up to us. He’s such a great boy.

Meeting with Judge Bob today and Théo's Birthady

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Today is Theo’s first Birthday! I asked Susie and she said they normally do the Birthday’s for the month all together. She asked us if we wanted to do Berline’s birthday at same time because we were here and her birthday is June 14. She said it would be Théo, Berline and Nathan’s. 2 of the volunteers baked the cake this afternoon, however we had to go sign in front of Judge Bob today and we only arrived late. She said we would have the party tomorrow after we arrive from court. We drove up to Kenscoff to see the local Judge. We were supposed to see him the day we arrived but his son was in the hospital. When we got there... to our surprise, we drove up to his house. He was planting flowers in front of his house. We got us to come inside. It was like entering a cool room. The house was made of cement. We sat at the table and he wrote a paragraph in a book. He then got us to sign the middle part of the page with our passport number and our home address. That was it. I asked him if we could take a picture with him and he started jumping up and down... He was so excited!!! He reminded me of Eddy Murphy when he acts all crazy in his movies.

Being with Berline today felt really real to me. I am going to just love being her mom! I think I already have the diaper thing all mastered LOL! Victor is not there yet, but I am hoping he will hahaha! He watches but did not get his hands dirty. Victor was able make her fall asleep in his arms. I tried but was not successful. She is like a little fish... she just flops and jumps. I think she is more comfortable in his arms because they are bigger hahah!

We got to know the Team of 11 that are staying at the guesthouse with us. They are producers from California. They made the film, Like Dandelion Dust, film about adoption. 2 of them have adopted as well. They are really nice people. One of the guys sort of did a photo shoot with us.

Victor went to the Baptist Mission (shopping area) today with the team. I had already went last year so I stayed with my little princess and Théo. We just played upstairs on the balcony.

Walking to main house in the morning to see Berline (Kyanne)

Signed adoption papers in front of Judge Bob.